life coaching – Doing not Dreaming

It’s about time for another post about life lessons from running. This one starts in Munich. Usually I’ll be mulling over the many benefits of running from positive health impacts to bringing you into contact with people who share your interest and therefore are one step closer to supporting your crazy dreams. But this is different. It’s a race but there’s no finish line or cut off time – so how do you know when to stop? [See below for the answer in terms of running.]

I was mulling over this whilst I was running, in between checking my watch, grabbing some energy from the food and water stations and enjoying the changing landscape once outside the city. I had no idea where I was going to end up, but instead of staying at the start line and worrying about it, or trying to plan the exact route, I started off when the cannons fired and kept taking steps forward.

2019-05-04 21.31.18-3 — Catcher cars at the ready

Fortunately, there are some clever calculations so you can work out how fast you need to be to get to a particular distance before the car catches you. In some ways you can make it like any other race: run the distance. However, there’s a small caveat – you can’t slow down and make up time later in case you get caught, going too fast sometimes makes you slower so pacing is crucial and what happens when you make the distance? Do you stop running, congratulate yourself and wait patiently for the car to formally acknowledge that you have completed your race? Do you re-calculate, set a new target up your pace and run on to the next km marker, then the next, then the next?

2019-05-06 08.53.18-7 — Once you finish you get a shiny, gold blanket

Of course, there is no right or wrong answer, or rather both of them are the right answer. As life patters on, you may find yourself reaching your goal: getting a new job, taking that dream holiday or buying that house and then what? Sometimes you need to stop and pause for a while, enjoy the place you’re at and reflect, review. After a little while it will be time to decide what’s next – to metaphorically lace up your running shoes for the next race. Other times you may get to the goal and it can be your springboard to something else – new opportunities appear, the route is clear ahead and you have the energy to keep going.

There will always be a time to pause and the great news is that you get to decide when that is.

You get the choice of saying: Good job. I’m done for today. Tomorrow is a new day maybe we go again, maybe we rest. Occasionally if you’re not listening to your body you get a reminder – think catcher car – that says you need to stop for a while.

The truth is you never really stop, you pick your direction with a destination in mind and keep going. Sometimes it feels as if you’re stuck mud and sometimes it feels as if you are way off track. It’s ok to reset, recalculate and even to enjoy the meander for a while.

I would love to hear where you’re heading right now – leave a comment or send a message.

[It’s the Wings for Life World Run where you run until the catcher car catches you. Runners get 30 minutes head start and the car is speed limited. It starts at 14kph and increases speed every 30 minutes.]

If you’re feeling stuck, unsure or cautious about taking action then I would love to help. The first step is to get moving (yes, actually moving, take a walk or dance or something) and then get in touch for a chat. I’m currently offering coaching on a pay what you want basis.

I’ve always been fascinated by pilgrimage. For as long as I can remember my life has been about enjoying the journey – an idea of a destination but making the most of the twists and turns that happen along the way.

I’ve never been hugely competitive: I want to do my best and step up when it matters, but I’ve never had a “winning at all costs” attitude. This means that I can enjoy doing things, just for the sake of doing them. My wide range of hobbies and experiences reflects this. That’s not to say I don’t feel nervous about doing something new, or joining a new group, but that I would rather try something than spend too much time wandering about it. I enjoy the doing and am less focused about the end result. Trust the training and you will be OK in the race. Start taking action and the opportunities will present themselves. Enjoy the journey.

A pilgrimage can have religious meaning to it, and there are well defined pilgrimage routes. Paul Coelho’s “The Pilgrimage” opened my eyes to travel in itself as facilitating a transformation even though it describes a journey along the Camino de Santiago de Compostela, which is definitely a religious route.

In simple terms and with thanks to the British Pilgrimage Trust:

“Pick a destination, set an intention and start walking”

There is nothing simpler than knowing that your task for the day is to get from point A to point B. I walked St Cuthbert’s Way earlier this year – a quasi-spiritual route, slightly off the beaten track – and discovered that a pilgrimage really gives a chance to re-focus on the important things in life. It could be down to the digital detox, keeping an active body, or abundant fresh air. Whatever it is it is a good combination.

SL272381 — Modern day pilgrim. Day One: St Cuthbert’s Way

For me, travelling solo is made easier by having an intention, or tasks, or theme for a trip – a reason to do it in the first place. I’ve never expected a specific revelation but more revelled in the unexpected: places I wouldn’t have visited; people I wouldn’t have met and a story to tell when I get home.

And if walking is not your thing then take some time to observe the steps you’re taking on your life journey. Particularly if you are contemplating or starting a life change. What steps have you taken? How far have you come? What is your intention? If you bring this into the context of a physical journey, remember that it’s ok to take a rest day (or week, or month), it’s ok to feel frustrated that you haven’t made “enough” progress and it’s surprising how often you find you have reached your “destination” with no fanfare, and a realisation that it’s not quite what you expected.

And now? Your homework is to reset your pilgrimage destination – this could be a physical journey (no destination is too close to home); or a step towards your dreams – and to start “walking”.

Let me know how you get on.

Tag: life coaching

Where do I stop?

Pilgrimage